On the Lack of Necessary Time, and Admitting Defeat

[sakon76]

Yesterday, Pat, one of my writing class classmates, e-mailed me about the San Diego Writer's Conference (~5 weeks from now) and asks if I'm going, together with a "oh, and submissions for advance readings are due in by this Saturday" (I paraphrase).

Which, together with the cost, pretty much settles it that I am NOT going. If I'd had two weeks, maybe. Five days? Including mailing time? On top of the $425 registration + hotel costs + $50/advanced reader? In reviewing the conference website this morning, I've actually had a small panic attack. I can't do this. I've been too stressed over health and holiday crap, don't have enough prep time, and my first 15-20 pages aren't ready enough.

(I am, in fact, beginning to accept that the entire goddamn book may never be ready enough. Let alone the sequel, which is fighting me hard. I can write pretty good fanfiction. Original stuff, apparently not so much. Maybe a fanfic writer is all I really am.)

Comments

[mmouse15.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I admire all that you do, and I especially admire your ability to figure out when something is too much and not do it. I think you're brilliant in that regard.

Also, I think you're a fine writer, but original fic is much harder than fanfic. I have faith that if any one can do it, you can.

[verusmayaii]

Don't lose hope... I've been looking forward to your original writing ever since I stumbled upon your old Mebius fics... :)

[toothycat]

Your original writing is pretty good, in my opinion. I'm not a publisher or agent, sadly, but I do have an awful lot of books to my tally and Queen's Choice is easily of a similar quality as most of the fantasy I read. I liked it, I liked the characters and it was a smooth read. And - not wanting to put any more pressure on you - I do want to read the sequel.

I think it's harder with original fiction to step back and see it objectively. I know I can't do that with mine any more. So you'll have to take my word for it, but it's true ^^

[roseembolism.livejournal.com]

Don't give up- you've got something written down, which is saying a lot. Just keep writing.

[sandpanther.livejournal.com]

Sometime ask cadhla how many rewrites she did on the first Toby book, and how long it took her to get it sold. I don't know the exact answers to those two questions, but I do know that she did a couple of heavy re-writes, and I think it took at least half a decade to get the book sold. And yet look where she's at now. Being ready to give up is part of the process. Keep going, and push on to the next step.